Failure.. stepping stone to more failure??

Today I woke up at a comfortable 9.30 . the whole day was wasted in watching the match. In the afternoon I saw a movie and went on the ground to watch the cricket match between Juniors and alumni. A lot of time wasting during the whole time, and I ended up in a dinner party with only junk food. After stuffing myself, I came back to the room and stayed up till 3-4 for no reason, watching a couple more movies in process.

Is there a pattern I am detecting here?? I have done similar things in the past. I did change my lifestyle a few times, got new habits, got rid of old ones. The consistent result was I drifted back to the old habits after sometime. The drift was so slow that I didn’t even feel I am sliding back. This time, because I am chronicling the progress, I am atleast noticing that drift. This is an improvement over last attempts, but not much of encouraging one. I mean, something has to be done right?

I woke up late, at around 9.30AM, and wasted the whole day. I also had paneer and other junk food by truckloads. I can feel the aftereffects even days after I do this. the drowsiness keeps me aware of what I am eating. I am also curious about why I chose to sleep late. Maybe it was a trade off between craving for the party, and the need to abstain from more temptations. Whatever maybe the reason, the compromise still set me back by a long way. Sleeping late for one night means, the disruption of the schedule for the next few days. Irregular sleep timings and skipping on exercising and so on. Even I start craving fatty, oily foods after I get a sleep deficit to carry around.

I am planning to think about this today evening, and come up with solutions for many problems i have noted down in previous posts also. I am sure I have all the tools I need with me, it’s just the application of concious thought to the problem is what is needed. In fact, I have this nagging suspision that I am abstaining from thinking much about the change because of some unconcious reason. That also must be brought to the light.

Overall, a bad day, in terms of goal implementation. It will have to be analyzed and learnt from. Improvement is the only way forward.

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